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Back to Sermons Index Back to Home Page 13th April 2008 PMGUARD YOUR SEXUALITY Pastor Colin Meadows Proverbs 5:1-23 Ø Live wisely! We have so much information bombarding our lives that it is hard to make good choices. To live wisely is as a Christian is to make good choices, to sift through all the information that is pouring into our lives and discover the godly knowledge that we need to successfully meet the challenges of life. We are seeking to live in the light of God’s revealed will for our lives. To be wise in a godly sense is to live life as God intended. Since God created us, it makes perfect sense to me that he knows best how we should live. The Creator knows his creation. Wise living is thus seeing life from God’s point of view and living that way. In order to be wise, we need to watch and learn. A fool learns from nobody’s experience, an ordinary person learns from their own experience but a wise person learns from their own experience and others, and from God’s Word. Let’s thus be wise and grow! What do we need to do if we are to grow? God fearing attitude – the attitude we need for the journey - ‘The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge’ (Prov 1:7) Reach into God’s Word – the Bible is the greatest source of wisdom – ‘Let the wise man listen and add to their learning’ (Prov 1:5) Obey what you have learnt – apply wisdom in daily living - ‘Doing what is right and just and fair’ (Prov 1:3) Willing to share with others – pass on what you have learnt – ‘Do not withhold good from those who deserve it’ (Prov 3:27)
Ø Grow in wisdom As you take in God’s wisdom you will know which way to walk. Your life will be characterized by discretion. Discretion is to choose a course of action that has appropriate limits and boundaries. Prov 2:10-11 “For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.” Prov 5:1 “My son, pay attention to my wisdom, listen well to my words of insight, that you may maintain discretion and your lips may preserve knowledge.” As you listen to God you will know where the boundaries are in life, where to go and where not to go. You will be a person who exercises discretion. Tonight we look in particular at walking wisely and with discretion in our sexual lives. Ø Guard your sexuality We live in a sex-saturated society. Sex is used to sell just about anything. A recent report noted that sexually suggestive adverts were being used effectively in the US to sell vacuum cleaners, toilet paper, Volvo cars, Lavazza coffee, hamburgers, milk, fresh fruit, real estate, Playstation 2 and Apilia scooters. The doors have been opened it seems to approve just about every kind of sexual expression going. What should our response be as followers of Jesus? We are to walk a different pathway… Prov 5:7-8 “Now, then my sons, listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say. Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel…” Walk with discretion, within appropriate boundaries. Several times in Proverbs we are told of a young man who, by walking wisely, will be saved from the woman who is called an ‘adulteress’. The word for adulteress used here literally means a ‘stranger’ or ‘foreigner’. She is one who should be off limits, one who is to be avoided at all costs. You are to beware of stranger danger! There is thus a lot said about men in Proverbs when it comes to watching their sexual lives. What about women? How should a woman walk? Prov 11:22 “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” This proverb speaks of something that is very precious and beautiful but is in the wrong place. As a woman, don’t allow yourself to end up in the wrong place! Again we find that important word ‘discretion’ used. Women are to walk with dignity and honor within appropriate boundaries, living a life of self-respect and integrity, keeping you sexually for the man of God’s choosing. Right from the beginning of time, God’s plan for human relationships was made very clear: Genesis 2:24 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.” The order of what should happen is thus clear. A man is to leave his family of origin, be united to his wife in a public declaration of commitment and then express this union sexually. Today in Australia we have mixed this up, at great cost to those involved. Couples now try before they buy, with over 72% of couples living together before marriage. Sometimes there try several partners, in the hope that in this way a person will find the perfect mate. Such a pathway is not God’s plan for human relationships. You are uniting yourself with a stranger, says the writer of Proverbs, if you take this pathway. Don’t go that route. It is not the route of wise living. Instead, wait patiently for the person of God’s choosing and then commit yourselves to each other publicly before you express this commitment sexually. I remember as a child collecting a parcel for my birthday from the post box on the farm. I found it too hard to wait until my birthday, so I opened the present a couple of days early. My father admonished me and then when I did open it again on my birthday, several days later, I was so disappointed with myself. Wait! This is so hard to do in a society in which the boundary markers have been removed and many young people don’t have good role models around them. Young Christian couples are seen as ‘out of touch’ or naïve in not living together before they marry! But don’t worry what society thinks – be more concerned about what God thinks and what the long term impact of your actions will be in your lives! Follow God’s plan and your lives will be blessed as a result. Then when you have joined together in a marriage relationship, seek in God’s strength to be faithful to each other. Ø Seek to be faithful Keep your eyes and heart on just one person now, the person you have committed yourself to before God and before witnesses. It is a bit like when you are seeking to buy a car. You search until you find what you have been looking for and then make the commitment. You drive home, excited with what you now have. Immediately stop looking at other cars from that time forth!! The search is over! Prov 5:15 “Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well… May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.” God has provided that very special person to be with you and to share your journey. Keep your eyes focused on them alone and don’t begin to think about drinking elsewhere. Then if you are tempted, remember your wedding vows and stop right there! Ask daily for God’s strength to live a life of faithfulness. The cost of unfaithfulness is just too high a price to pay, so don’t go there. Prov 6:32 “But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.” At times you may think that it is just so hard. What should you do at those times? ØTrust God with all your heart Follow after God with all your heart. Submit to Him, asking for the strength to live a life that pleases him. Prov 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Trust God and cling to him. Perhaps God’s pathway for you is to find a partner and marry. Ask for his strength to live a life that honors him. Perhaps his pathway for you is to be single. Ask for grace and strength to accept that from his hand and to live a life of purpose. Trust God and submit to him for then you will find his direction for your life. Ø What if you have messed up? Perhaps you have gone far sexually from the pathway that God intended for you. What should you do? The first thing to realize is that God already knows. We can’t hide anything from him. You haven’t caught him by surprise. Prov 5:21 “For a man’s ways are in full view of the LORD, and he examines all his paths.” Prov 15:3 “The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.” God knows so let’s stop pretending that he doesn’t. If you have messed up sexually and feel trapped, talk to God about it in total honesty. Tell him what has happened and ask for his strength to start the journey out. Don’t prolong the pain!! Start on the way out right now. At this point, let’s not be too judgmental of each other. We all are capable of walking off the path, just a hair breath away from falling. Prov 6:25 “Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes…” Jesus puts us all under his spotlight of sexual purity:. Matt 5:27-28 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Yes, we all stand condemned in one way or another. But the wonderful news is that there is forgiveness, if we will turn to God in repentance. 1 John 1:8-9 “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” The amazing news of the gospel is that God wants to renew our lives, to make us like we are fresh from the box! Respond now by faith, submitting to Jesus as Lord. Ask him for strength to guard your sexuality – it is so precious and is not to be thrown around like yesterday’s newspaper. As you do that you will become a person who is growing in wisdom, day by day. Walk thus with discretion in your sexuality. A wealthy couple advertised for a chauffer and four men where selected for the final interview. The wife asked them all to look at a nearby wall in the yard and asked them how close to the wall could they drive the car without damaging it. The first man thought he could get to within a foot, the second man thought six inches while the third man thought he could get within three inches without scratching the car. The last man had a different focus. “I don’t know how close to the wall I could get without damaging the car. Instead, I would try to stay as far away from the wall as I could.” Let us walk with discretion in our sexual lives and so bring honor to our God.
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